Top of My List

July 5, 2013 § 4 Comments

img010Making lists has always helped me. Not only serving as reminders of things to do but as a way to clear and organize my cluttered mind, especially before falling asleep at night or, when half-awake with my morning tea and paper, I prepare to seize my day.

Being a visual type, I picture the list as a ladder: First I prop it, steady against  the rockface of my day, (sometimes a gentle slope with grassy tufts sparkling with dew, other times a jagged, dark and daunting granite wall heading into the clouds) with each rung ready to be checked off, leading to the top of the hill: a completed list and a sigh of relief . . .

Oh but I wish . . .

Days never happen as planned and The List, standing like the two stones of the Decalogue, becomes a different kind of reminder: where few things, or nothing, has been checked off on time, appearing set on a Sisyphean course.

Still, I love the task of making lists. They are my day’s anchors, points of departure and, when needed, signs of hope . . . it never occurs to me that the task is futile. On the contrary.

So now, this being written down, I am elated and relieved because “posting on my blog” has been on the top of my list, looking at me every morning for too many days.

And tomorrow this “must do” will takes its place again, far back at the end of my list.

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§ 4 Responses to Top of My List

  • vtbee says:

    you are in good company, my dear! and i adore your illustration.
    b

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    • squatorclamor says:

      Thank you my friend! It is so nice to know that every time I post I can count on a great reply of encouragement from you! I need it…

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  • I love the ladder as list idea and your gorgeous illustration. You are gifted at writing about an everyday thing and making a New Yorker worthy essay! Sending love…..let’s meet soon. Maybe lunch or dinner with Brenda at The Market Table? xox

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  • Shelby Grantham says:

    Dear Victoire–

    Another treasured connection. I have a whole file labeled “To-Do Lists,” where I put all my partially crossed-out lists. I keep thinking they’ll come in handy when I need details for some character in a piece of fiction (but really they’re in the file as proof that I was an incredibly busy person, since some days, too many days, I am not certain I really exist. Anchors, as you say. But when I write down things not on the list after I have done them, just so I can cross them out, what on earth am I doing? And is making lists really profitable? I dunno. I think some of the reason I make lists is so I don’t have to do what I need to do. Write.

    The illustration speaks volumes. I hope all your blogs (which I mean to read) get illustrated.

    Affectionately,

    Friend Shelby

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